I haven’t done the math. But I know the number of hours I’ve spent listening to whistleblowers’ stories since I began reporting on this topic almost three years ago is a big number. Also big is the number of attempts each whistleblower has made to speak up in their system before they see any movement at all.
But more haunting than the numbers in these stories are the questions with which people wrestle in real time. These whistleblowers report in broken systems, protected by broken people, formed by broken cultures. And usually, the ones who speak up are the ones who have to pick up the pieces.
Change in society is slow, with setbacks and often severe backlash, said Jason Martin, a whistleblower, advocate, adjunct professor, and social scientist with a PhD in sociology. (Read one of his recent writings here.)
“Sometimes when you look at it, it’s like, was the backlash worse than the progress made?” Jason Martin said.
In his interview with me, he compared the path of whistleblowers to the first wave of troops on D-Day.
“The first several rows are going to get mowed down so that the other people can climb up on them,” he said. “If you get into that bleeding edge of progress, you’re going to get wailed on.”
His analogy took my breath away. And yet he has hope.
“Hopefully you can look at the overall arc and say, ‘Well, there’s been progress,’” he said.
I try to provide practical tips to questions that you send me. But this week, I want to recognize your questions that don’t have easy answers. These are questions that haunt you, drive you, scare you, and which others not on this journey may not understand. In order to truly honor the complexity of your own individual situation, I’m not going to try to offer easy answers. But at the end of this post, I’ll share some encouraging thoughts Jason has learned from his own journey.
What is my responsibility in this?
If you see something, must you say something? What if you try saying something and then you become the target of bullying and retaliation? What if you lose your job and simply need to figure out how to pay the bills? But then what if you hear of others who are suffering from leadership failures, what can you do next? And then what if the cards are stacked against you, and the other side adds even more power to its side, and the truth is surrounded by even more lies, should you speak up yet again? What, then, if no one is listening?
When should my whistleblowing end?
Even after you’ve experienced or seen abuse, you decide to report it to a manager because you truly trust the system to do the right thing. You’re shocked if or when the system fails you. In some systems, there’s another way to make a report. But then the next attempt to report can fall through the cracks, or not be believed, or you’re deemed not credible because the abusive leader has disparaged you behind closed doors. Especially in cases when the alleged abuser is a high-level leader, his or her power seems to grow at the time that your resources diminish. Do you keep going? For how long? Until you’re crushed from the failures in the system? Or until change happens?
Can I survive this?
There is real risk for whistleblowers to report abuse. Many of you have lost jobs, money, your reputation, and legal battles. Due to stress, some lose marriages, your health, your mental health, and your hope. And the deception masquerading as truth makes you feel like you’re losing your mind. But if you don’t report, you can also lose jobs, money, reputation, health, hope. And your voice.
Should I keep hoping for change?
Hope can be this catalyst and this beautiful force that keeps us going. We should guard it, right? Because we need hope to speak up one more time. But then is it foolish to keep hoping for change, and better to just walk away and kick the dust off our feet?
What does freedom look like for me?
Jason raised this question in the first of two interviews with me this past week. It haunted me through my own challenging week of reporting and whistleblowing.
In his own words:
“Would we be free if we stopped paying any attention and recognize it’s not our responsibility? Or is it more free to use the agency that you have and make sure that people are aware?”
Jason’s parting thoughts:
“The most healing moments have been and continue to be sharing the stories where you have someone who’s listening, someone who’s hearing you, and also in supporting others who are going through similar things,” he said.
“But the exchange for being in a team is you’re taking on the burden of so many other people,” he added. “If you’re going to be part of a big fight that’s going to take a lot of work and that’s going to happen over a long period of time, you’re going to need to rest and take care of yourself.”
If you connected with Jason’s piece on Adult Clergy Sexual Abuse, he recommends these resources: Clergy Sexual Misconduct Information and Resources and the Restored Voices Collective.
(Disclaimer: This is my own personal opinion, intended as general information, and not meant to replace legal or psychological advice for your specific situation.)
https://youtu.be/x0EFfpOzsEU?si=ZqC3EfElO2ILHQl4
Explains everything